Tonight’s episode of Smallville
on December 23, 2019 at 1:01 amChapter: What If...? Walky Went To College
Characters: David Walkerton
Location: Joyce and Walky's apartment
If you’re ever wondering why a particular Joyce and Walky! feels more like a misplaced Shortpacked! strip, the answer was often “I’m doing a storyline over there and I need to pop-culture-vent immediately for some reason.”
Take that, CW intros and outros!
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Ah, Smallville.
The also-ran of any given DC TV series family.
Shit was huge.
From what I recall, that’s basically how that show was.
“well, this is the part where Clark gets shot!”
“hello! this is the part where Clark gets shot!”
CHAPTER 9: THE PART WHERE CLARK GETS SHOT
[ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: The Part Where Clark Gets Shot
This is that part.]
[MOVIE UNLOCKED: The Part Where Clark Gets Shot has been unlocked in your Gallery! Would you like to watch it now?]
[GUN UNLOCKED]
Different chapter.
Well, the network that showed Smallville in Canada apparently didn’t have that.
That was probably for the best.
Likewise in the UK.
Wait, had you already started Shortpacked by this point?
I was kind of hoping for simultaneous rerun/commentary.
Seems like we’d almost have to, once the crossover stories start.
Other people take a shot at life, life takes a shot at Clark
I’ve never watched Smallville. I’m assuming Clark Kent would have to come up with some excuse for why he’s not hurt after being shot, unless everyone somehow already knows he’s got superpowers.
The first rule of Smallville is that everyone’s an idiot who will believe the dumbest explanation as to why Clark Kent can’t possibly have superpowers, even though it seems like that would make him the only teenager in town who doesn’t.
The second rule is that, even though nobody knows what it is, all the bad guys have Kryptonite for some damn reason, so Clark was probably shot with that.
It all seems to boring when you have actually lived the life, right Walky?
*Lana looks where he was shot* “You’re not even hurt?” “Uh…yeah it…grazed me.” “But there’d still be literally any indication you were shot.” “LOOK OVER THERE!” “What? What is it?” *Clark zooms away* “I don’t see anything? …Where’d he go?” Honestly you could replace Lana with any character there and it’d still be pretty accurate ngl.
You missed the random head trauma. Random head trauma is the MOST important part of Smallville.
And John Glover’s insatiable appetite for scenery, of course.
Liked chewing it, did he?