The year 9571
on March 4, 2020 at 1:01 amYeah, when I ran that spaceship simulator ride at Mars 2112, occasionally there’d be somebody’s dad trying to “prove” that our “simulation ride” to “the planet Mars” to “eat duck pizza” was, in fact, a ruse!!!! By asking questions, jackassedly. One time somebody asked me what the speed of light is, if I’m so smart and a spaceship pilot.
I don’t …. confidently know what the speed of light is off the top of my head, but I gave the best answer that I thought sounded vaguely close enough from memory? I think, like, “180,000 miles per second,” and that number might have belonged to kilometers in real life, or I messed up something or another — I am not presently going to check Google — but I get the feeling that dad didn’t know the answer either, and we all went merrily on our way.
Like, congratulations, you pulled the veil from our eyes, thanks, sir.
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You don’t have to know about space aliens.
The space aliens know you.
This ~300 megametres per second is brought to you by Diane from EGS *w-w-wink*
And knowing that totally doesn’t make you some kind of nerd.
yeah but hey guess what! they STILL EAT THE DUCK
…or did, I guess
or didn’t, since it’s gone now and dang it I want to try the duck pizza
(objectively, I would’ve hated it tho)
I’ve had Hoi sin duck pizza, it was nice. Hoi sin duck being one of my favourite foods (though usually on pancakes) probably affects that. I also don’t have cheese on pizza (or anything else) which probably helps too.
I thought I loved duck, but every time I order it, it feels like there’s one AMAZING bite, and five hundred “picking around the bones” bites
Yeah, who’s laughing now, customer?!
I mean, 97% is an A+ in most books, so…
In that situation, I would have gone with the smartass reply of: “C”
Yep, that would be my choice as well.
Possibly going the Monty Python route first of asking the questioner to clarify whether they mean the speed of light in a vacuum, since it does change the answer (though if they then said no c wouldn’t be the correct answer and I wouldn’t know the value either, maybe just stick with c).
The other option is “I don’t know. I’m not really an astronaut. And you knew that, and brought your child here to disappoint them deliberately. Who is the better person here?”
First, you were extremely close! It’s 186,000 miles per second.
Second, I would ask that jackass customer if he knows how an iPhone works.
Given when this comic came out, that would have been a hell of a question!
I don’t understand the point of asking jackass questions like that when you’re going to a themed restaurant. I would assume they know it’s not really a spaceship with space aliens and stuff already.
Yeah, kinda like claiming that an amusement park ripped you off because the mascots were people in costumes and not actually talking animals.
Galaxy’s Edge – 1 star. Lightsaber doesn’t cut anything, Kylo Ren demonstrates absolutely no telekinesis. “Rey” unable to answer questions about space flight. Droids are cool, though.
I’d have just started singing the Galaxy Song. Come to think of it, since Sal doesn’t specify units 5 could be technically valid by some bizarre measure.
The sideways joke here is that Sal is part alien given her Martian DNA. She should just bend something hard (or someone) in half or jump out a window to show her prowess.
Everyone knows light travels eleventy speed, duh. Ask any five-year-old.
*shrug*
How fast is a mile an hour?
It’s the speed that a gallon bottle of water reaches when pushed over a frictionless surface a furlong long by a force of 3.8 pound-force.
I mean, it depends on the wavelength. When the light is green, maybe 31 mph. If it is red, you have to come to a full stop.
Best answer: “the velocity at which photons travel through unobstructed space”
“The ‘Speed of Light’? Jeez you monkeys are primitive! You guys still think that’s a thing?”
Five is technically right because she never said the unit of measurement
“How should I know? Did you have to memorize the speed of sound for your driving exam, Earth punk?”
…and this, children, is why we can see now this female-shaped hole in Pluto’s surface.
I like to think Sal pauses to do air quotes with her fingers every time she says something bracketed by ” “.