It’s right in the jingle. Hamburger Helper helps your hamburger help you make a great meal.
Your hamburger doesn’t need a helper. Your hamburger is helping you and has an assistant. You’ve mistaken the hamburger’s altruism for actually wanting your burger to taste good.
Which implies that the burger itself is sentient and we are monsters for eating it. That’s why the commercials distracted us with mobile sentient glove creatures invading our kitchens.
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YOU MONSTER!
What he’s going to do next, knock down this guy’s egg holder(s)?
I never understood why hamburger needed a helper. Just put some cheese and bacon on a hamburger, and you’re good.
Aren’t those helpers?
“Ground Beef Casserole Helper” just doesn’t have that marketable ring to it.
It’s right in the jingle. Hamburger Helper helps your hamburger help you make a great meal.
Your hamburger doesn’t need a helper. Your hamburger is helping you and has an assistant. You’ve mistaken the hamburger’s altruism for actually wanting your burger to taste good.
Which implies that the burger itself is sentient and we are monsters for eating it. That’s why the commercials distracted us with mobile sentient glove creatures invading our kitchens.
He put a lot of time into that food!
At least 15 FULL minutes!
Originally posted:
November 10, 2002.
Actually, November 11th, 2002
Jaaaason!
Geeze
I see how it is.
We’re goin’ out.
Anybody got any ideas?
So Now You’re A Secret Agent
Waw-Kay
That many snack chips
How’s “The Talk” coming?
News crews
shit, this one’s better
Hypocrites
I ought to shoot you.
One small snag
not again…
The birds and the bees
Zero help
You look a mess.
I don’t know you
That’s impossible!
I can’t believe it.
Jason’s intimidation tactics all involve getting rid of things his victims want in their mouths
…Nope, too easy.
Hitting where it hurts
So, when is HHGuy gonna show up in the Dumbiverse?
https://youtu.be/zAsyiIlnMaY
He did him a favor. Hamburger Helper is nasty. So are Sloppy Joe’s/Manwiches. Come at me.
Beware the Manwitch, he’ll get you with his lazer
Jason is evil! That guy was just making a great meal!