…Mom?
on September 19, 2021 at 12:01 amChapter: The Wedding
Characters: Amber O'Malley, Assorted Future Kids, David Walkerton, Donna Warner, Dorothy Keener, Head Alien, Joyce Brown, Mike Warner, Mrs. Brown
Location: The Wedding Church
I realized a bit later that, HEY, crap, I already pulled a very similar moment in the final It’s Walky! battle where somebody jumps in front of a bullet meant for Walky, that time with Grace and Mandy. Dangit!
Anyway, watch Mike quietly clock that Amber is fighting their own time-travelling child, Donna. I mean, at this point in the timeline, she hadn’t been conceived yet, so Mike’s mostly noticing, hey, this kid looks like she’s ours. This is one of those previously-mentioned moments that I wouldn’t have been able to pull off if I’d finished Joyce and Walky! in a timely manner.
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Was not expecting that.
º3º “It’s Jumpy!”
That’s Donna? Wow, must’ve been quite the backstory since Animal Crossing.
oh dang yeah, must’ve finally gotten free of the bus stop
So that’s why she wasn’t in any of the future kid army scenes before the wedding!
You know, it was an adult Donna (or at least late teen one) waiting in that last strip. It is actually kind of canonically plausible for Bus Stop Donna to have been a redirected Machete-Searcher. If you ignore the part where Aslan was a metaphor and only ambiguously in the Walkyverse, anyway.
I mean, Shortpacked! ended with the walls between reality and fiction crumbling. It’s possible Aslan got stuck in the Walkyverse when those walls were patched up, and then accompanied Donna back in time so that he could get back home during the time when those walls were open again, so he could wait at his own fictional bus stops.
It’s also possible that I’m applying way too much logic to a joke that was never meant to be followed up because the whole point was that we’d never know what happened next
My headcanon that I came up with just now is that Shortpacked!Aslan was the test run for whatever mechanism Galasso used to resurrect Jesus.
Now someone will have their eye out!
And not an icicle in sight to blame it on.
Oh no, not Carol!
eh
Ah yes, Donna, she has her dad’s eyes.
And so Mike begins planning his first words to his yet-to-exist child.
Gotta say, even if this Carol isn’t quite as terrible as Dumbingverse Carol, there is definitely some catharsis watching her get shot. If I ignore what happens after, anyway.
*Incoherent foaming at the mouth about how no one can jump in front of a bullet that way, stop making everyone believe that it’s possible, pop culture, what more evidence did you need to know that Sherlock had gone to shit by season 4*
Can’t it be a reaction to the aiming?
I don’t know how the fuck anyone watched any Sherlock and decided it was trying to be a grounded, realistic, serious show. “Someone jumps in front of a bullet” doesn’t even crack the top ten most implausible things that happen in it.
Oh no, Carol was shot! Anyway…
oh no not guns, a superhuman’s one weakness, thank goodness we live in america where those are super rare
mike: “i wonder if this sorta-amber-haired kid is related to me, she’s frowning and attacking everyone dickishly the way i do, but they’re all doing that so that’s not much of a clue”
when did carol get super-leaping powers
Oh no!
Anyway.
Somehow having missed yesterday’s strip, I initially thought Carol was just levitating in front of Walky for some reason. Then Amber’s statement made me think that Carol had actually been shot AT them. But no, the truth is a little more mundane than old ladies being launched out of (presumably) cannons.
Honestly, I wouldn’t put it past HA to equip his minions with a gun that fires people’s relatives at them. I mean, it’s just an adaptation of MM’s monkey cannons to his usual realm of manipulation.
I wouldn’t put past HA to mount such gun onto a giant robot called Relative Master.