Man, remember when this was a thing? Staying up into the wee hours of the night, hoping your parents are asleep, keeping constantly vigil while simultaneously trying to find a nipple somehow?
I only remember going onto my mom’s computer and typing in “boobs” on video sites and not knowing how to delete the history. (also it took 10 years for the pages to load cuz Dial-up.)
I grew up in Britain. Our satellite channels were provided by Sky, which means they didnt use scramblers, they just blue-screened everything out. Youd have to wait for the free previews on the porn channel which lasted 10 minutes at 10pm, 11pm, 12am, etc untill 5am. I remember one time me and some friends got drunk one new years and tried to watch some laughably bad porn on the previews at 4am in the morning.
I’m old enough to remember pre-internet times, but by the time I had any interest in photographic images (as opposed to the drawing in my books about puberty), I had easy access to the internet.
I know a friend’s little brother who once tried to watch scrambled porn in a lobby of a university campus building when he was about 13, because he was weird and enjoyed offending/grossing-out people.
There was this one TV set I had in those days that had tuning controls. They were two buttons such that holding one down would gradually turn the current channel into the next channel with static in the transition, and the other button turned it in the other direction. Basically like a radio tuning dial, but as two buttons. I guess the point was to customize the channel layout, but I managed to discover an alternate use. Holding down both buttons at the same time cancelled out each other’s tuning and also brought a kind of stability to the scrambled channels. There was still no sound, and the colors were either inverted or desaturated, but you could make out the picture perfectly. So that’s how I spent a good chunk of my teenage nights in the late 90s, right in front of the screen with two fingers on those buttons for hours. I’m surprised the impression of those buttons aren’t still branded into my fingertips.
Because the state of mind I’m in when willing to watch grainy soundless TV porn isn’t really conducive to productive crafting, and when I’m sober enough to dedicate the time and effort to such solutions I’m also incidentally aware of how dumb the end goal is so I wouldn’t consider it regardless. Clearly, just waiting a couple years for privately accessible internet was the most efficient approach.
Yeah, that struck me as odd, too. My college did this annoyingly bizarre thing where you might have a final on Saturday during finals week, however, all the regular exams would have occurred during normal class time.
Unless Danny is in a Saturday class? My school had those, too, but there wasn’t a really good reason for a normal undergrad to look at those (they were for non-traditional part-time students who had normal workweeks), most of us also tried to avoid having classes on Friday, so we certainly wouldn’t have voluntarily taken one on Saturday.
I remember life before the Internet. I remember when a random Penthouse found as litter on a back road was a gift from the porno gods to a teenage boy.
Even though instances of the picture aligning enough to glimpse a discolored breast for a half second were few and far between, the audio generally was completely clear. Porn audio by itself is still a wonderful thing.
Hey, even after the internet started, most of the porn sites just gave you 10-second teaser clips, then paywalls. The free porn didn’t really become ubiquitious until after YouTube.
I do remember those days of late night fuzzy channel watching. Internet was becoming more accessible, but I could only access it at my grandparents’ house. Not that that stopped me.
Fuzzy floor carpets were a bad influence on me, I must say.
I was born with the advent of the Internet hitting mainstream. By the time I got ‘curious’, it was already a click away.
My dad once forgot to pay the bill and we lost half our channels for a month. He managed to get the sports channels back by fiddling with the cables.
I thought colleges subscribed to all the softcore porno stations
Well, we do get Lifetime Movie Network.
… Oh wait, you said softcore porn, not suffering porn.
Today’s kids, man, they don’t know how hard it was. I mean, uh, how difficult it was.
I only remember going onto my mom’s computer and typing in “boobs” on video sites and not knowing how to delete the history. (also it took 10 years for the pages to load cuz Dial-up.)
Nope, ’cause I got French channels. Just wait until it’s late enough for the movies to start and nudity everywhere!
Yup, CBC French late on Friday night. Also, tinfoil balls on the cable wire actually worked for a while.
I was born in ’92. By the time I was old enough to know or care what porn was, the Internet was already widespread.
’93 and same.
The sad part is that fanfiction gave me a better idea of what sex entailed than the public school system. Ah, abstinence-only sex ed curriculums.
I grew up in Britain. Our satellite channels were provided by Sky, which means they didnt use scramblers, they just blue-screened everything out. Youd have to wait for the free previews on the porn channel which lasted 10 minutes at 10pm, 11pm, 12am, etc untill 5am. I remember one time me and some friends got drunk one new years and tried to watch some laughably bad porn on the previews at 4am in the morning.
Those were the days.
I’m old enough to remember pre-internet times, but by the time I had any interest in photographic images (as opposed to the drawing in my books about puberty), I had easy access to the internet.
I know a friend’s little brother who once tried to watch scrambled porn in a lobby of a university campus building when he was about 13, because he was weird and enjoyed offending/grossing-out people.
There was this one TV set I had in those days that had tuning controls. They were two buttons such that holding one down would gradually turn the current channel into the next channel with static in the transition, and the other button turned it in the other direction. Basically like a radio tuning dial, but as two buttons. I guess the point was to customize the channel layout, but I managed to discover an alternate use. Holding down both buttons at the same time cancelled out each other’s tuning and also brought a kind of stability to the scrambled channels. There was still no sound, and the colors were either inverted or desaturated, but you could make out the picture perfectly. So that’s how I spent a good chunk of my teenage nights in the late 90s, right in front of the screen with two fingers on those buttons for hours. I’m surprised the impression of those buttons aren’t still branded into my fingertips.
Why didn’t you use a coat hanger two cotton balls, a paper clip, and….. A small weight to hold the buttons down? Mcgyver it.
Because the state of mind I’m in when willing to watch grainy soundless TV porn isn’t really conducive to productive crafting, and when I’m sober enough to dedicate the time and effort to such solutions I’m also incidentally aware of how dumb the end goal is so I wouldn’t consider it regardless. Clearly, just waiting a couple years for privately accessible internet was the most efficient approach.
If there is a way, it will be found.
Rule 43?
Wait, Indiana University gives tests on Saturday nights?!?
Yeah, that struck me as odd, too. My college did this annoyingly bizarre thing where you might have a final on Saturday during finals week, however, all the regular exams would have occurred during normal class time.
Unless Danny is in a Saturday class? My school had those, too, but there wasn’t a really good reason for a normal undergrad to look at those (they were for non-traditional part-time students who had normal workweeks), most of us also tried to avoid having classes on Friday, so we certainly wouldn’t have voluntarily taken one on Saturday.
http://moly.hu/konyvek/ursula-k-le-guin-ursula-k-le-guin-osszes-szigetvilag-tortenete-ii
Finally, someone notices! I don’t get it either… I thought the author commentary will be about that, but I was wrong.
(Sorry, my browser went crazy.)
That’s funnier than the comic. (Sorry Willis, I’m a jerk.)
Finally, someone notices! I don’t get it either… I thought the author commentary will be about that, but I was wrong.
I remember life before the Internet. I remember when a random Penthouse found as litter on a back road was a gift from the porno gods to a teenage boy.
…Life before the Internet sucked.
You are lucky, my found porn as a teenager was a granny porn magazine, I was mentally scarred for years.
So we’re just gonna forget about Howard then?
Joe’s trying to get the porn for Howard. It’s one way to cheer him up! “Hey, I know your sister’s dead and all… but… here’s a live one!”
Even though instances of the picture aligning enough to glimpse a discolored breast for a half second were few and far between, the audio generally was completely clear. Porn audio by itself is still a wonderful thing.
The pre-internet era…
Hey, even after the internet started, most of the porn sites just gave you 10-second teaser clips, then paywalls. The free porn didn’t really become ubiquitious until after YouTube.
Most of the time, it seems like I read the comic, get mildly amused, read the commentary, burst out into giggles, and say ‘Fuck you, Danny,’
Why can’t every comic be like this?
I do remember those days of late night fuzzy channel watching. Internet was becoming more accessible, but I could only access it at my grandparents’ house. Not that that stopped me.
Fuzzy floor carpets were a bad influence on me, I must say.
Originally posted:
September 30, 1999