Freedom of movement
on October 11, 2021 at 12:01 amChapter: It's Pregnancy!
Characters: David Walkerton, Joyce Brown
Location: Joyce and Walky's apartment
When you have twins, you don’t do fuckin’ SHIT for like two whole years. If one parent leaves for like even fifteen minutes, it’s like abandoning the other parent to a tornado, Man of Steel-style. You can barely hold things together when it’s the both of you.
You definitely don’t spend hours at a time together alone without your infant preemie children, swimfucking in a lake or canoodling in restaurant booths or hanging out with friends, pretty sure. Don’t ask what I’m throwing shade at.
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10 Cloverfield Lane, right?
That’s a movie with Mary Elizabeth Winstead and John Goodman. you’re thinking of 9 Chickweed Lane.
It’d be an easy mistake to make, they’re both horror stories with creepy dudes and alien monstrosities but only one of them is doing it on purpose
It never occurred to me that 10 Cloverfield Lane’s title was somehow a 9CL reference, but now…
This feels suspiciously specific
So that’s how Machete joined a certain party, only to later bemoan, “I never thought leopards would eat MY face!”
Ah, there’s that ‘sometimes we forget who’s supposed to be the straight man this week’ dynamic I love.
They’re both like this, but in shifts!
It’s the BEST.
That doesn’t just happen with twins. Just sayin.
Between our youngest and COVID, we haven’t done anything in like 5 years.
I believe him when he says it’s worse with twins, tho. As much as it might feel like it, one child can’t ACTUALLY be in two places at once.
And if this pandemic keeps up, no one will do things for 5 years
I haven’t done anything for much longer than that, and I’m single and childless.
.. Huh. Maybe that’s why. Whoops.
It’s amazing how one small child can make two grown adults feel outnumbered and surrounded.
Just imagine: in one timeline, Joyce and Walky own a leopard that Machete has a close relationship with. In a specific one, it’s named Mr. Monkey. When asked, Joyce refuses to explain and Walky gets misty eyed and is unable to elaborate.
Beware of the leopard.
Oh, Willis.
We’re here on the rerun site. We’re invested in the Deep Willis Lore.
We still haven’t gotten that horrifying Bondage Jesus Face out of our minds yet, and likely never will. When I close my eyes, he’s still there. Shrieking.
(Somehow I’m more invested in knowing what new horrors are in 9 Chickweed Lane right now than, like, actually GOOD comics. I hate this.)
The weirdest thing about 9CL is that despite how it is excessively horny all of the time it is completely unable to depict characters that are even remotely visually appealing. Every character in that comic is just viscerally repulsive at all times.
9CL and its Boomer following is like a trainwreck that was hauling fertilizer. You don’t want to watch, but you can’t look away, and you don’t touch the poop.
I’m kinda glad that my only exposure to 9CL is through Willis’ criticism of how ridiculously awful it is. I’d be annoyed if my local newspaper carried it in the comics section. If I read my local newspaper that often, of course.
Ah, the upsides of being a 3-parent household with two easy aunts/uncles nearby.